Fortunately, this does not apply to me. I found love 15 years ago. And, I wasn't chosen out of 25 eligible women. I was chosen out of roughly 170 girls at Crandall High School. Haha. Pick me, pick me ... and Jared did. Twelve and a half years of marriage later - all because two people fell in love - we are a success story. (Just like Ryan and Trista from the Bachelor season something.)
While watching the Bachelor last night it reaffirmed how grateful I am to be happily married and not looking for love. Poor Melissa and shame on Jason. It was such a sad moment in Bachelor history coming from the man we felt so sorry for last season. And although I want to rebel against ABC and say I'll never watch it again, I'd be lying. And, what's the point? I'm sure it matters very little to you and to ABC what I choose to watch. I'm just angry at how this played out. I could go on and on but again, what would be the point.
Back in the day, I was the type of girl that fell hard and fast. Boyfriends could expect no less than three notes a day and a phone call as soon as they got home (this was before cell phones and in the midst of cordless phones). And don't think breaking up freed them from my stalking - it got worse. More phone calls and desperate letters spilling my guts out, making big promises; begging and pleading for the relationship to continue. There have been four meaningful relationships in my life. Evidently, the fourth time was a charm. I can think of only two random relationships because that wasn't how I rolled. I wanted something serious all the time.
My first encounter with love started in 7th grade at the distric track meet on April 1, 1989. Joe became my everything. There were many rough - and I do mean rough- years. At one time, I was forbidden to see him, snuck around and eventually would get caught. This went on for at least a year. The psychologist convinced my mom to let me see him , in hopes that I could move back home from my grandparents, quit running away and stop the suicidal threats. (I told you it was rough!) I cannot tell you how bad my first three years of high school were at home because I was determined to have Joe in my life forever. Because of how it ended and out of respect for his legacy, I won't get into why he was so wrong for me. My senior year, Joe was killed in a car accident. Rumor has it that he was hurrying home to catch his ride to the football game, where he planned to "beat up" my boyfriend. This tragic ending shattered many dreams, left me with many memories and changed the course of my life forever. Because of the addiction I had to him and his possesive nature, I have no doubt that like the four years we were in an on again, off again relationship - pitifully, that's the way the rest of my life would have played out, leaving me forever in a desperate situation. (This is a story I'd love to share more in depth sometime because that day 15 and a half years ago changed my life for the better and because Joe was a Christian, his life was also changed for the better.) He wasmy first love, introducing me to the concept of love and then to some of my deepest sorrow.
Bachelor #2 was a church friend that lived up the street. He moved to Crandall in 5th grade and a couple of girlfriends later, I finally landed him. If Joe and I were broken up it was usually me and him until 11th grade when I suspect he had had enough. Why he'd always take me back throughout those six years is beyond me. Somewhere in all of this, I grew to love him but it was a different love. It tended to be a love/hate relationship. He could be so mean and brutally honest but on better days he was a great friend. On the one extreme there were restraining orders against Joe and I am pretty sure they blocked my number from calling their house. It got that bad. Needless to say, I was crazy about this boy but just could not pull my life together enough to move away from my past. On the other extreme there was the part where we always had so much fun on the youth outings, scampering around the neighborhood before we could drive and lots of fun going places when we were able to drive. We grew up together. He was one I could always be myself around. I always thought that if I could break away from Joe, this would be the one I would marry. We had been through so much together. After Joe died, I could not help but wonder what might have been but it was too late, we had both moved on. He did call me the night before he left for College Station and we spent a few hours on the phone. We truly made peace with all the years of turmoil and bitterness that had surfaced. More than anything, I needed this phone call with the happy ending.
Bachelor #3 was so, so , so much fun. He was younger but I enjoyed being the taxi driver - haha! He also lived up the street. I am trying to remember how this relationship came about - I'm thinking it was because of mutual friends. It started one summer and was full of "summeristic" memories - swimming, late nights, movies, a teen dancing club, cruising. His personality was what I loved most about him. Our senses of humor were a lot alike so imagine two goofies dating - ha! We had so much fun and were always laughing at each other. It was him that caused Joe's jealousy on that dreaded night. And, it was him who became one of my rocks during this sad time of my life. Things just didn't work out between us. Even the letters and song mixes I created on a cassette tape couldn't keep us together. I'm sure the death, the depth of my sorrow and my temporarily altered personality were just too much. He was young and I do not blame him for not wanting to carry this burden.
A couple of months later, in Art class my senior year, I finally wrote the note that would change my life forever. Jared Davis became the love of my life. I graduated high school (1994) and went to college. He graduated high school (1996) and we were married two months later. We have spent 15 years creating an amazing life with three precious children, a wonderful house on five acres and being what we wanted to be when we grew up. In each of my past three meaningful relationships I learned many things. I learned a lot about myself, about growing up, about letting go and how to make things work. I've won some and I've lost some and because of it all, I am a stronger person. I'll be the first to admit that it has not always been easy but without a doubt, it has been worth it. I am thankful that God placed each of these bachelors in my life at the times that He did and I'll be forever thankful for the one that stuck around and has blessed me in so many ways for so many years.
And to Melissa, sometimes you kiss a lot of frogs before finding your prince. Evidently, Jason couldn't shake the four legs and the green skin...
While watching the Bachelor last night it reaffirmed how grateful I am to be happily married and not looking for love. Poor Melissa and shame on Jason. It was such a sad moment in Bachelor history coming from the man we felt so sorry for last season. And although I want to rebel against ABC and say I'll never watch it again, I'd be lying. And, what's the point? I'm sure it matters very little to you and to ABC what I choose to watch. I'm just angry at how this played out. I could go on and on but again, what would be the point.
Back in the day, I was the type of girl that fell hard and fast. Boyfriends could expect no less than three notes a day and a phone call as soon as they got home (this was before cell phones and in the midst of cordless phones). And don't think breaking up freed them from my stalking - it got worse. More phone calls and desperate letters spilling my guts out, making big promises; begging and pleading for the relationship to continue. There have been four meaningful relationships in my life. Evidently, the fourth time was a charm. I can think of only two random relationships because that wasn't how I rolled. I wanted something serious all the time.
My first encounter with love started in 7th grade at the distric track meet on April 1, 1989. Joe became my everything. There were many rough - and I do mean rough- years. At one time, I was forbidden to see him, snuck around and eventually would get caught. This went on for at least a year. The psychologist convinced my mom to let me see him , in hopes that I could move back home from my grandparents, quit running away and stop the suicidal threats. (I told you it was rough!) I cannot tell you how bad my first three years of high school were at home because I was determined to have Joe in my life forever. Because of how it ended and out of respect for his legacy, I won't get into why he was so wrong for me. My senior year, Joe was killed in a car accident. Rumor has it that he was hurrying home to catch his ride to the football game, where he planned to "beat up" my boyfriend. This tragic ending shattered many dreams, left me with many memories and changed the course of my life forever. Because of the addiction I had to him and his possesive nature, I have no doubt that like the four years we were in an on again, off again relationship - pitifully, that's the way the rest of my life would have played out, leaving me forever in a desperate situation. (This is a story I'd love to share more in depth sometime because that day 15 and a half years ago changed my life for the better and because Joe was a Christian, his life was also changed for the better.) He wasmy first love, introducing me to the concept of love and then to some of my deepest sorrow.
Bachelor #2 was a church friend that lived up the street. He moved to Crandall in 5th grade and a couple of girlfriends later, I finally landed him. If Joe and I were broken up it was usually me and him until 11th grade when I suspect he had had enough. Why he'd always take me back throughout those six years is beyond me. Somewhere in all of this, I grew to love him but it was a different love. It tended to be a love/hate relationship. He could be so mean and brutally honest but on better days he was a great friend. On the one extreme there were restraining orders against Joe and I am pretty sure they blocked my number from calling their house. It got that bad. Needless to say, I was crazy about this boy but just could not pull my life together enough to move away from my past. On the other extreme there was the part where we always had so much fun on the youth outings, scampering around the neighborhood before we could drive and lots of fun going places when we were able to drive. We grew up together. He was one I could always be myself around. I always thought that if I could break away from Joe, this would be the one I would marry. We had been through so much together. After Joe died, I could not help but wonder what might have been but it was too late, we had both moved on. He did call me the night before he left for College Station and we spent a few hours on the phone. We truly made peace with all the years of turmoil and bitterness that had surfaced. More than anything, I needed this phone call with the happy ending.
Bachelor #3 was so, so , so much fun. He was younger but I enjoyed being the taxi driver - haha! He also lived up the street. I am trying to remember how this relationship came about - I'm thinking it was because of mutual friends. It started one summer and was full of "summeristic" memories - swimming, late nights, movies, a teen dancing club, cruising. His personality was what I loved most about him. Our senses of humor were a lot alike so imagine two goofies dating - ha! We had so much fun and were always laughing at each other. It was him that caused Joe's jealousy on that dreaded night. And, it was him who became one of my rocks during this sad time of my life. Things just didn't work out between us. Even the letters and song mixes I created on a cassette tape couldn't keep us together. I'm sure the death, the depth of my sorrow and my temporarily altered personality were just too much. He was young and I do not blame him for not wanting to carry this burden.
A couple of months later, in Art class my senior year, I finally wrote the note that would change my life forever. Jared Davis became the love of my life. I graduated high school (1994) and went to college. He graduated high school (1996) and we were married two months later. We have spent 15 years creating an amazing life with three precious children, a wonderful house on five acres and being what we wanted to be when we grew up. In each of my past three meaningful relationships I learned many things. I learned a lot about myself, about growing up, about letting go and how to make things work. I've won some and I've lost some and because of it all, I am a stronger person. I'll be the first to admit that it has not always been easy but without a doubt, it has been worth it. I am thankful that God placed each of these bachelors in my life at the times that He did and I'll be forever thankful for the one that stuck around and has blessed me in so many ways for so many years.
And to Melissa, sometimes you kiss a lot of frogs before finding your prince. Evidently, Jason couldn't shake the four legs and the green skin...
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