a work of heart

Spring break has come and gone and so has the week after. Here we are at the end of March, already. It's crazy to think of how fast the days, weeks and months seem to go, when looking back. Some days seem to drag on and on but before you know it you aren't thinking back about that day but the month or the week that has gone by - in a flash.

Every day I find myself smiling a little more, relaxing and going with the flow a little easier and a little less surprised at the kinks that arise (and oh lordy, have there been some kinks - just sayin'). The kinks get ironed out slowly and leave behind just a few wrinkles. These wrinkles will probably always be on my heart but thank goodness the heart is an organ that heals. I am aware of this, as my heart has been broken through deaths, through disappointing those that mean the most to me and through this divorce. But, my heart is on the mend ... I can feel it.

Jared and I sat and had a heart to heart talk the other night and thank goodness he can be calm in my storm because it could have been ugly. He had to bring me back around - out of my anger and out of my selfish will. This was not an easy task, but he managed. The kids were here because I felt that it was so important for them to see that their mom and dad could still sit and have a peaceful conversation together. Heartbreakingly, Ashlyn presented us with a picture of the three of us - her in the middle - holding both of our hands. It's a simple reminder that no matter what happens, Jared and I share three very special blessings that nothing or no one can ever take away from us.

In this talk, we decided that it is time to sell the house and leave the bad memories behind us. It was wishful thinking, I guess, to think that we could live this way. It's just not a "home" anymore. Neither of us have felt comfortable with the situation so selling is inevitable. It's a little scary to look to the future with uncertainty as to where I will go and many other unanswered questions, but I know who holds the future and that is certain enough for me. After all, this is our temporary home.

I can feel the power of prayer as so many of you have told me that you are praying for me. I have such a peace that I know can only come from Him. Thank you for loving me and thank you for being such great friends. Thanks for helping me turn my frown upside down!